Are you a Proverbs 31 woman?

I would like to encourage you to analyze how you fulfill the Proverbs 31 woman.  But we first need to realize that although she sounds magical and impossible to be, she didn’t do all these things at once in her life. This chapter talks about all her virtues in stages. 

As women we have stages in our lives:

The teen stage: We have to decide who we are and recognize our worth
Proverbs 31:10 “She is worth far more than rubies”

The single woman: We have to learn to be strong and how to stand on our own 2 feet
Proverbs 31:16 “She considers a field and buys it: out of her earnings she plants a vineyard”

The wife: We have to learn to share our life with someone else and create our home
Proverbs 31:11 “Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value

The mother: We become the role model for them to imitate and follow
Proverbs 31: 20 “She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy”

The empty nester: We start to hear “Thank you mom” from our children who are no longer children
Proverbs 31: 28 “Her children arise and call her blessed; and her husband also, and he praises her”

The grandma: We enjoy the children again but we get a different view this time around
Proverbs 31:26 “She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue”

God is seeing your hard work: 
Proverbs 31:31 “Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gates”

We don’t have to be “Supermom.” We have to enjoy whatever stage we are on because soon it will be over and we can’t go back. If you are single then begin to pray for your future spouse. If you are an empty nester keep your future children-in-laws in prayer while your kids are in college or single.  Always remember our Heavenly Father is always there for us no matter what stage we are on.

While we wait...

Our family went through the profiles available online and entered the age ranges that we were approved for.  There were only 6 profiles including 2 sibling groups and 4 individual children. Last week, we started by requesting information on the 2 sibling groups first.  Within 4 days all but 1 child was taken off the website. I was told that could mean the children were reunited with parents or were ready to be matched with another family.  This left me hanging because I didn’t know if we were one of the families being considered for one or any of the children.  I asked about this and was told that less than a week had passed and some workers take 1 week or more to consider and organize the family files submitted.

We were told we have to wait for at least a week or so. I’ve had the conversation with the girls about God’s will being done in this adoption. I accept his will and plan and have asked him to shut and open doors as he sees fit so we get the child(ren) who He intended to become part of this family.  The girls were sad to see the pictures disappear from the website a few at a time but they are willing to wait for God’s will.

But on a good note we are registered for a matching event this weekend and are excited to see other kids that haven’t been posted on the website yet or we haven’t heard of. We have our family flyer submitted and our worker will have several copies to hand out. I am praying to be able to share this Christmas with more kids but open to God’s will and plan.

Please keep us in your prayers as we continue to wait and attend the matching event.

Praying for your Husband

10 ways to pray for your husband:

1.       Pray for wisdom

2.       Pray for patience

3.       Pray for a servant’s heart

4.       Pray for God’s purpose in his life

5.       Pray for guidance

6.       Pray for his mental battles

7.       Pray for spiritual struggles

8.       Pray for his ministry 

9.       Pray for an intercessor’s hear

10.   Pray for favor at his job

When praying for your husband think about the different hats he wears. If he is a father, supervisor, vice president, sales representative, or a mechanic he can always use your help with prayer.  Does your husband have peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control? I check off the things he has and keep praying for those he needs to work on.   

Have you covered your husband in prayer today?

Our home is officially open!!!

We had our adoption case worker come out and we signed the last papers needed to finish our
file. We are officially open for both legal risk children and legally free children. We are excited
because now it is just waiting until God allows the boy(s) to enter our lives. It is very surreal to
be this far into our process.

I am now working on a "family flyer" that our case worker will be giving the workers of the
children we are interested in. I am also working on putting together a scrapbook about our family
to present when we are called for interviews and such. We have started requesting information on a couple sibling groups.

We continue to pray for God to lead the way to the future members of our family!

Our homeschool

We were lead by God to homeschool. I had never thought I would be a homeschool mom, we
started homeschooling our daughters last fall. It was very scary and overwhelming at first, but I
had a wonderful friend who helped me through my questions and concerns.
We used purchased curriculum last year but this year we put our curriculum together ourselves.
We separate the subjects into monthly unit studies. We cover Science, World History, Creative
Writing, Math, Spanish, Music (guitar and violin), Spelling, Geography, Home Economics and
Bible.
Every month we learn a different unit for science and world history. The unit is broken into 3
weeks of learning followed by our "fun" week. The last week of every month I plan field trips,
arts and crafts, activities, movies, documentaries and projects which will help us review what
we've learned all month. We have our monthly spelling bee in which we review the words we
learned that month. I also let them write their memory verses in chalk on a cement wall in the
back of our home.
Last year we didn't participate in a co-op, but this year we joined a co-op and the girls love it!
We chose to join a co-op that only had electives, they have gym, art, music, and logic. They
aren't given any homework and they love seeing there friends every week.
Do you homeschool? What works for your family purchased curriculum or do you make your
own?

Parenting and Homeschooling

I have 2 daughters, ages 8 and 10. They love God with all their heart and love to worship! They know that Jesus Christ died on the cross for them and that He is, and forever will be, holding His arms open for them to run into. We discussed if they wanted to be referred to as aliases or their real names and this is what they agreed on... Nerdy and Cutie! lol

Nerdy is 10 years old. She loves to read, dance, write, play on the computer and play the violin. She is my sensitive and "please everyone" child. She is very compassionate and doesn't like to see anyone upset. She will let a lot of emotions pile up until she loses her cool.  We are teaching her to speak about her emotions at the time of the incident and not allow things to build up.

Cutie is 8 years old and loves all animals! Her hobbies include drawing, singing, and playing her guitar. She has an extra spoonful of emotions. She is very loving, cuddling, and caring but she can flip from happy to upset without much prodding. She has a temper, but she is learning to control it. She can also get her feelings hurt by something as simple as a joke.

As a child I was like Nerdy where I had to suppress my emotions and was unable to discuss them. I remember my brother purposely nagging and nagging me until I would blow and he would just laugh at me. My husband was more like Cutie where, even being a guy, he was sensitive and hot tempered at the same time.

We will be discussing parenting topics and suggestions that we have learned from parenting books, parenting workshops, and hands on experience!

Marriage

We said "I do" in November 2002 just a month after my 18th birthday! Crazy right? We actually started planning our wedding 4 months into our relationship! I wasn't taught about courting but when we look back that's what it was. We both knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. Now everyone who is married knows it is not always roses and chocolates, but if you have all 3 components necessary then you will make it to old age.

First, a strong marriage needs God and then a man and a woman. They need to have an individual relationship with Jesus Christ and then with each other. We lift each other when we are down and we are there to give each other encouragement with faith, finances, patience, etc. We seek God as the foundation of our marriage and the solid rock it stands on when the storms come.

We have learned a lot about marriage in our experience and in our research. Marriage (like a bank account) is all about balance. Is your Marriage Account overdrawn? You need to make deposits before you withdraw. Have you told your husband " I love you" today? Did you wake up early to make breakfast even though the kids don't wake up early? Did you write a note on his napkin in his lunch bag? All these are small deposits that when you get into a small argument are left with "love points" not in negatives.. :)  Sounds silly but it is very serious when it comes to the survival of your marriage.

Foster care Adoption

When we were dating we had discussed adoption in God's timing. In November 2012, God placed in my husband's heart that it was time to adopt.  We began doing the research for different agencies and how they work. In February 2013 we decided on the agency we wanted to work with and made contact.But this meant a lot of change. We had to get a second car and move to a bigger place before we could get approved.

We are being dually licensed so we can get children who are a " legal risk," which means the parents' rights have not yet been terminated but most likely will be.  It has been a very long process of paperwork and trainings. In September we were approved through foster which means at the moment we are waiting for all the paperwork to be copied and transferred to the adoption side of the agency for the matching process to begin.... :)

You will be jumping on board a moving train but we know there is still a-ways to go and we ask you keep us, and our future son, in your prayers.

Marriage Tips for Her

How much contact do you have with your husband during the week? Does he work 40 plus hours out of the home? Men may not be as emotional as we are but it is in their nature to be needed and wanted.  I'd like to offer 10 suggestions to keep your fire kindled...

1. Set an alarm 15 min prior to his and cuddle for those last minutes in bed
2. Wake up early and make him a hot breakfast
3. When you pack his lunch write him a note on a napkin
4. Pack one of his favorite snacks for a lunch dessert
5. Send him a text just saying " I miss you" or " I can't wait to hug you"
6. Watch "his" TV shows or movies with him
7. Get him his favorite candy at your next gas stop
8. Make his favorite meal once every 3 months
9. Ask him to help you lift something heavy or leave a light bulb for him to change
10. When the kids ask a tough question say "That's a Daddy question"

I am not saying do all of these things every day! What I am suggesting is do a few a week and earn some love points on the scoreboard. There is no such thing as too many love points. Be prepared for when you get into an argument or disagreement and points are taken away. Don't end up owing points.

Give it a try and lets talk about it over coffee!

Update #1 Adoption with Foster care

I have 2 girls, ages 8 and 10, that are mature little girls who are pretty independent and very quiet. I have had the tutus, tap shoes, soccer balls, beads and glitter glue everywhere.  I am looking forward to the trucks on the steps and the balls all over the place.

Last Tuesday we got our first "call"! It was much harder then I ever imagined. We got a call about a 4 year old little girl who was in our town, needed to be placed in the next few days (no waiting) and looking for a home that would be willing to adopt in the future. But we had to say no, because we only  have 1 extra room in our house and since she is already 4 in one year she will not be able to share with a boy. I would be giving up my dreams of finally having a little boy running a wreck in my home. :)

About 5 days later I get the letter in the mail saying we are approved for foster care in our home. Tomorrow our case worker will be coming by to finalize the last papers to open our home for adoption. "Legal Risk" is when the child is technically still in foster care but they have started the process of possible adoption placement. The children with legal risk are those which only have about 3-6 months before rights are terminated and parents have made minimal to no effort to get them back. You are taking a risk because the parents can all of sudden turn and get everything done.  Reunification is always the goal. I am not looking to take away anyone's child. I am looking to be blessed by a child who has nobody willing to offer them a loving, healthy and stable home.

Welcome!

  I have had it in my heart to open up a blog all about being a woman. But not just any woman.. being a Godly woman. One that went through a lot as a child but can still be a good mom to her children. One that has been married for 11 years at the age of 29. One that is going through an emotional roller coaster as she is adopting through the foster care system. One that is a homeschool mom to 2 beautiful girls growing up in this world. Above all, one who has a relationship with God and asks everyday WWJD?

   I am hoping to share with you stories and experiences that you can relate to. I will be posting every Tuesday. I am looking forward to learning about you and your life stories... Grab a cup of coffee and lets talk!